my side of the story... wanna hear it?: frust....

Saturday, June 23, 2007

frustration... tht's wat i've been feelin for da past few days... pilin homework (my fault actually), other responsibilities, puttin up wit ppl askin reli stupid questions, etc... my patience is wearin thin... reli... i jus finished my pengajian am presentation... da powerpoint presentation is done but da speaker notes n other notes r not yet complete... hav to finish everythin by tmr... i still hav an essay to write... chem still got some questions... math tuition homework not yet touch... hav to cram everythin tmr... all this has lead me to question myself... i dunno y but things jus don seem to be headin da more comfortable direction for me... maybe its my lazy attitude (i hate to admit but...) or maybe its somethin else... da surroundin factors to play a role... ppl jus seem to ask/tell me things at da wrong time... for instance... 2day mornin i went for breakfast wit my dad... ask we were sittin down n sippin our tea... da topic of takin risks came out... i had my own opinion so did my dad... but our opinions kinda contradict... so i gave an example to clarify/strengthen my point... but then my dad said "y would u do tht? its not a realistic example... there is a better way to bla bla bla..." i was seriously taken aback... i said "its jus an example... y r u changin topic?" after tht i jus kept quiet while my dad continued... then this question kept runnin in my head "why did i bother to even talk in da 1st place? if i jus shut my damn mouth ntg would hav happened..." doesnt seem like a big prob rite? but things arent as they seem... some situations jus make u feel like 'i jus should not hav done it'... it doesnt matter whether its somethin big or small... its kinda frustratin... im seriously beginnin to crack under pressure... wit my patience wearin thin, da littlest of things can make me lose my temper... i cant help it... i tried stayin positive but there is no effect... prefect probation is comin up in a week or two... i reli hope i can stand tht period... if not i might jus do somethin i will reli regret...